Talking drummer, Ara believes that African men relish the idea of being with a strong woman but cannot handle the reality of being in a relationship with one.


Aralola Olamuyiwa, better known as Ara was a guest on Vanguard‘s Instagram Live session on Friday where she bared her mind of sundry issues ranging from how she started drumming to being a single mom and feminism.





“No, I don’t feel inferior. I’d be lying if I say I don’t miss that stability of having a partner in my life, but one thing I’ve come to realize in this part of the world is that African men cannot contain a strong female like myself”, Ara told Vanguard‘s Benjamin Njoku when asked if she feels insecure being a single mom.


“Men like the fantasy of dating a star, but they cannot hold down a relationship with a star, a celebrity, a strong woman. This is not entertainment only. It’s about strong women in all fields. It takes a very strong, self-confident man to have a relationship with women like us. We are very strong. It doesn’t mean he won’t love you. He will love and respect you.


“For me, over the years, I’ve been single. I’ve been single since 2011. I’ve been careful in getting involved. I’ve gotten four marriage proposals, but I turned them down, because I could see that these men really liked and wanted to marriage, but would not be able to sustain the relationship and I would have to leave again because they had insecurity issues and were easily intimated.”


She further said she ended a four months relationship because of her partner’s insecurity.



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